Finding Your Heart's Desire

Finding your true Heart’s Desire in life is not always as simple as it seems. We often make decisions from our left, logical brain, putting practicality before passion. We can actually have both if we learn to listen to our hearts. We can do this through accessing our right brain by writing with our non-dominant hand.

I teach my clients and students what I call The Heart’s Desire Practice. This is a practice done every day for all the seemingly insignificant choices we make, like what to wear, what to eat, what route to take to any destination, and so on throughout the day. Before making these ordinary choices, I suggest they ask themselves: What is my true heart's desire about this? Not what others are doing, not what is expected of them, not what they think they should do. This means letting go of old automatic default settings and allowing themselves to behave differently. I think of this as Heart's Desire Aerobics.

What does your heart really say about the seemingly insignificant choices or decisions all day long? If you do a daily Heart's Desire Practice, you will be exercising another set of heart "muscles," the ones that have to do with an emotionally healthy heart. This is a heart that "talks" to us when we stop to listen. In this daily Heart’s Desire Practice we prepare ourselves for the big decisions in life: career, residence, relationships, and more. I also extend this practice into journaling.

My heart writes to me with my non-dominant hand (accessing my right brain emotional and intuitive centers). I just let it talk to me about my life. I might even ask it to draw a picture of itself. Using the non-dominant hand (the one you don’t normally write with) for drawing and writing is a great way to get out of the default setting and try new ways of doing things. Yes, it’s slow and awkward, but it definitely shakes things up. More importantly it accesses the right brain creative and intuitive centers where breakthrough thinking happens.

Another way to listen to your Heart’s Desire is through vision boards and "bucket lists." I have written an entire book about integrating vision boards with journaling that features the non-dominant hand. It is entitled Visioning: Ten Steps to Designing the Life of Your Dreams. In the Visioning® method, we create magazine photo collages on large vision boards or in a journal. Picturing scenes, objects, and people expressing feelings and engaged in activities we enjoy is a way to allow the heart to speak to us.

These collages usually reveal parts of our personality wanting more expression. For instance, a photo of a "woman in red" spoke to me through my non-dominant hand. She told me that she is here to give me more vitality, courage and fun. She also wanted me to dress in brighter colors. If I've been working too hard, an image of a woman luxuriating in a bubble bath might speak to me through non-dominant hand journal writing, advising me to slow down, relax and restore my energy. Both of these women reflect parts of myself that have been dormant. If these parts have been ignored, discounted or given a back seat to other more responsible, “worker bee” parts, they will speak out sooner or later. They might cause low energy or illness in order to get my attention. Why not listen to them before such symptoms set in? They are all speaking from my heart.

Creating collages of nocturnal dreams can also illuminate our true heart’s desires and reveal parts of us needing more expression. The same journal techniques described above can be applied to dream work. Picturing the images in the dream and allowing them to speak, especially the parts that seem foreign or strange can open us to renewal. Like tiny sprouts emerging out of the earth in early spring, these dream images from the unconscious are often telling us about something new that wants to be born in us.

How do we know that parts of ourselves have been left out? We usually see symptoms: low energy, boredom, feeling we are in a rut, crankiness, irritability, burnout, physical pain, headaches, and even depression. Any of these may be signaling a need to listen to our Heart’s Desire.


Lucia

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The Non-Dominant Hand in Recovery Work

I first became aware of the potential for using writing and drawing with the non-dominant hand for recovery from a student in one of my Creative Journal classes. After class one evening, one of the students thanked me profusely for the journal class and how beneficial it was in her recovery in AL anon. As the wife of an alcoholic she was working on her own co-dependency and had been struggling with the 4th Step in the 12-Step program. She’d been struggling to write her personal inventory for a long time, but felt blocked from actually doing it. Her Inner Critic would then beat her up for not following through with her 4th Step assignment. She frowned as she described her plight.

Then her face broke into a huge smile as she talked about things had changed since taking my journal class. After doing my process in which we answer back to the Inner Critic, allowing the sassy Inner Brat to write with the non-dominant hand, she was able to do her inventory much to the amazement of her sponsor. Her victory over the critic was a great achievement. Answering back to the critic not only freed her to write her inventory but she started creating short stories about her childhood and teen years. She had found her Inner Writer. She later went on to teach writing to seniors and incorporated the block buster journal prompts from The Power of Your Other Hand to liberate her students had internal critics that were stopping them from writing.

Answering Back to the Inner Critic

If you are blocked about something in your life or struggling with a fear of failure, try the following prompt. Get out some 8 1/2” X 11” paper and a pen or set of colored markers.

List all of the self-critical statements you hear in your head using the second person, such as: “You aren’t smart enough to start your own business.” “Who do you think you are trying to go back to school at your age.” “Why are you taking this music class, you know you don’t have any talent.” “Making art is a waste of time. Get busy doing something more practical and profitable.”

Use your dominant hand to write your own version of these negative statements. Be sure to use the word “you” and not “I.” That way you won’t identify with these destructive beliefs and will be able to put them at arms distance. After you’ve written a page of put downs, put the pen in your non-dominant hand and answer back to the critic. Tell it off in no uncertain terms. Let your Inner Brat come out, express your anger about being put down 24-7 by this Inner Critic. Don’t concern yourself with spelling, grammar or penmanship. Just let the words fly onto the page. It may feel awkward and slow, but hand in there and keep writing. After you feel finished, read the words you wrote with your non-dominant hand.

Contacting Our Higher Power in Recovery

Over the years I have heard many reports from individuals in 12-Step programs that my books and workshops also helped them break through a block to writing their 4th Step inventory. Just as important was their discovery of a personal connection with their Higher Power that speaks to them through their non-dominant hand. They were able to tap into inner guidance and intuition that they never knew existed.

My most memorable experience of accessing our Higher Power through non-dominant handwriting happened at a weekend retreat I was leading for ninety-five women in recovery from alcoholism. The women had spent two days engrossed in Creative Journal and Inner Child work and sharing their innermost feelings and experiences. As the weekend was wrapping up I suggested they do a dialogue with their Higher Power. Using their dominant hand they wrote down a problem or challenge they were facing. They then wrote a request for help from their Higher Power. This was followed by allowing their Higher Power to write a response using their non-dominant hand. Since we had already done the prompt in which they answered back to their Inner Critic, I urged them to not worry about grammar, spelling or penmanship as it would be their Inner Critic who would judge these aspects of their writing.

After completing this final journal exercise, the women were then invited to share what they had written, on a strictly voluntary basis. Many of them chose to come up to the microphone and read what their Higher Power had told them. With clarity and heart-felt expression their words poured out from their hearts. They all agreed that this dialogue had made the experience of their Higher Power personal and tangible. The words sounded like ancient wisdom from scripture. There was a depth of compassion and loving-kindness in these journal entries that was profoundly moving. As more women shared the messages from their Higher Power there were more and more tears among those listening. The common insight shared by all in the final evaluations was that our Higher Power resides within us and can speak to us personally. They commented on how the Higher Power seemed to speak in one voice through all their writings. The wisdom in the words that came through the non-dominant hand were described as “loving,” “healing,” and “comforting.”

Lucia

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Everything Can Be Fixed

The following post was contributed by Lay Peng Tan who is currently in training to become a Certified Creative Journal Expressive Arts instructor and coach. In the process of working with my methods she discovered an Inner Artist who had been buried for some years. Here is a story about her most recent adventures in allowing her artist self to emerge and express fully.

Everything Can Be Fixed

“There is no need to cry, everything can be fixed!” There was this little boy perched on the stool staring at me as I took my place next to his, in front of my canvas at the local Muse Paintbar.

Since completing the Recovery of Your Inner Child series by Lucia Capacchione, I have rediscovered my inner artist. By now, I am a regular at the Paintbar. For someone who had hidden paintbrushes more than thirty years ago, to become an ‘undercover artist’, I consider myself doing quite well if I look at my collection accumulated in less than a year and the progress I have made.

Indeed, there is no need to cry. After learning the Creative Journaling techniques in Lucia’s books, life did become more manageable. There was a time when I thought being able to cry was a luxury: after I lost my dad, was assaulted, lost my opportunity to go to medical school all in a few months, I remembered walking around like there is ‘nobody inside.’ That went on for many years. New age techniques e.g. crystal, shamanic and equestrian therapies enabled me to cope at work and get back to normal life. Deep down, I had a longing to be like ‘normal’ people. I was unable to tap into my feelings or distant memories. I had become a version of the Grinch, who has a heart “two sizes too small.”

Whether my heart was held prisoner, buried or stolen, I had no idea. All I knew was: joy has also fled from my life. I had thought that being ‘emotional’ was the ill. It was when I learnt Lucia’s techniques that I fully appreciated the notion that it is not about hoping for no rain, but to be able to continue and take joy walking in the heavy downpours of life.

Who does not want the life skills?

I had thought that after all those lost years, art and I are not fated to be together. I was pleasantly surprised that far from having the critic voices in most art classes I attended as a child, in Lucia’s sessions and books, there are techniques to deal with these critics dressed up as well-meaning individuals, including myself.

I also really enjoy putting my feelings down on paper. And guess what? I even found my heart in one of the exercises in her book, The Well-Being Journal, page 37, "The Body Parts Speak."

By using my non-dominant hand to dialog with my dominant hand, I was amazed at what I got to uncover within. This helped me make necessary changes:

Dominant Hand: You seem to be very unhappy?

Non-Dominant Hand to represent the Heart: You bet I am. Yes, I am sad and pissed off at the same time. I am sadness. You always let anger steal the show and that makes me upset.

Dominant Hand: What are you sad about?

Non-Dominant Hand: I am sad because you do not always do the things you said you want to do.

Dominant Hand: Like what?

Non-Dominant Hand: Like writing down the proposal for staff training. Like making time to draw. Like taking me out to play more. Like eating healthier. Like drinking more water. Like stop doing so many unimportant things.

The Grinch’s happy ending and parting words, “To kindness and love, the things we need most," sure resonate with me. Having rediscovered my inner artist, “There is no need to cry, everything can be fixed!” has become a favorite affirmation of mine.

Being in the CJEA (Creative Journal Expressive Arts) community amidst many artists, I found my own heart was not much different from theirs: I learned to see the beauty in everything around us, the good, the bad, and with the knowing that spilling paint is just an opportunity to allow another form to emerge from the canvas. Most of all, I like putting my feelings on paper so they haunt me no more.

Lay Peng Tan

-----

Lucia

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Science Catches Up with Mapping Emotions in the Body

When my first book The Creative Journal was first published in 1980, I introduced my method of mapping emotions that get stuck in the body. In the first edition of The Power of Your Other Hand (1988) I devoted an entire chapter to this technique entitled “Finding the Healer Within.” Body mapping is done by creating a simple outline of the body and (using the non-dominant hand) coloring in the physical sensations that are speaking to us at the time. This is followed with a right-hand left-hand dialogue with each body part that has been colored in. The dominant hand asks questions and the non-dominant hand speaks for the body part. The choice of colors used in the body map is very personal and intuitive – there is no right or wrong way to do this. The written dialogues that result are profoundly insightful and usually lead to a decrease in symptoms and often to a complete healing. Many of my readers have reported amazing results using this technique. The detailed instructions appear in Chapter Six of The Power of Your Other Hand along with examples from the journals of my clients and students.

I’m happy to report that in recent years scientific studies have proven the physiological reality of what happens when emotions get stored in the body. The work of Dr. Candace Pert in her book Molecules of Emotions, led the way in scientific investigation of how emotions affect our health when they are not accepted and expressed. We all use terms like I had butterflies in my stomach, She’s a pain in the neck, This job gives me a headache, I’m shouldering too much responsibility, My stomach was tied up in knots, etc.

More recently, Riitta Hari, co-author of a 2014 Finish study on the bodily locations of emotion wrote, “We have obtained solid evidence that shows the body is involved in all types of cognitive and emotional functions. In other words, the human mind is strongly embodied.” Our brains are not disconnected from our bodies. Our emotions actually live in our bodies. Those common expressions as mentioned above have now been verified by science with new imaging techniques.

Embodied emotions have been mapped by neuroscientist Lauri Nummenmaa and co-authors Riitta Hari, Enrico Glerean, and Jari K. Hietanen. They did studies involving more than 1,000 participants in three experiments. These included having people rate how much they experience each feeling in their body vs. in their mind, how good each one feels, and how much they can control it. Participants were also asked to sort their feelings, producing five clusters: positive feelings, negative feelings, cognitive processes, somatic (or bodily) states and illnesses, and homeostatic states (bodily functions). They then made careful distinctions between emotional states, thinking and sensations.

On a computer, the study participants colored blank outlines of the human body, in response to a question about where they felt specific feelings. The researchers used stories, video, and pictures to provoke emotional responses, which registered onscreen as warmer or cooler colors.

Using imaging technology, scientists observed that similar families of emotions tended to cluster in similar places in the body. Anger, fear, and disgust tended to concentrate in the upper body, around the organs and muscles that most react to such feelings. Surprisingly, the so-called positive emotions of gratefulness and togetherness and the so-called negative emotions of guilt and despair all looked remarkably similar, with feelings mapped primarily in the heart, followed by the head and stomach. Mania and exhaustion, another two opposing emotions, were both felt all over the body.

The researchers controlled for differences in figurative expressions (i.e. “heartache”) across two languages, Swedish and Finnish. They also make reference to other mind-body theories, such as using somatosensory feedback to trigger conscious emotional experiences and the idea that we understand others’ emotions by simulating them in our own bodies. Read the full, and fully illustrated, study results in “Bodily Maps of Emotions,” published by the National Academy of Sciences.


Body mapping resources in Lucia’s books:
The Power of Your Other Hand

Hello, This is Your Body Talking

Drawing Your Stress Away
The Art of Emotional Healing
The Creative Journal
The Picture of Health (audio) – available only at luciac.com
 

Lucia

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Communicating with Animals using the Non-Dominant Hand

Letting your animal speak through your non-dominant hand

Over the years I have received many letters and emails from readers who have used my non-dominant hand writing technique for getting insights into their animals. Many have told me that they unlocked the mystery of a seemingly incurable or chronic condition that one of their pets was suffering with. Veterinarians were unable to correctly diagnose or treat their pet's illness. Using Chapter Eight in my book The Power of Your Other Hand, they wrote out dialogues in which they asked the animal some questions using their dominant hand. The animal answered through their non-dominant hand. The causes of many mysterious maladies have been identified through this method. 

Some animals have complained about living conditions and conflicts with other pets. In other cases the animal was suffering with a digestive reaction to certain foods. In a few instances readers have described emotions that animals were carrying from earlier owners, especially in the case where they had been abused and taken to an animal shelter. The new owner, who found the animal at the shelter and gave it a new home, was able to help heal the trauma that occurred by "listening" to what the animal had to say. It appears that really "hearing" and showing empathy for the abused animal is profoundly healing. Sometimes the specifics of the nature of the abuse were described by the animal "speaking" through the new owner's non-dominant hand.

For me, stories like these are always deeply moving, and the love and compassion shared by these animals lovers has been very touching. I never wrote about becoming an "animal whisperer" using this method because I hadn't really explored the application of the technique. I was very pleased to receive a book in 1997 by Arthur Myers entitled Communicating with Animals: The Spiritual Connection Between People and Animals. On page 24, Myers includes a story by Griffin Kanter of Houston, Texas, who read my book and decided to try the technique with her animals. In a dialogue with her dog Isaac, a poodle-terrier mix, with her right hand she wrote to Isaac that she was going to use this technique for communication. When Isaac started to reply through her left hand writing, she knew that it was indeed her dog speaking. She'd been using the technique for a few months and was used to sensing the subtle energy of whoever was speaking through her non-dominant hand. She felt Isaac's emotions and bodily sensations. Griffin went on to be able to communicate with her animals without writing. She could converse with them mentally, the way many "animal whisperers" do. (Note: my name is misspelled in the book as Catacchinone.)

If you have an animal who is in distress, or are in conflict with a pet or other animal, you can use this technique of dialoguing with both hands to gain insight and empathy into the animal's physical condition and/or emotions. Perhaps you will enhance your understanding of the dynamics between you and the animal as well.

With your dominant (writing) hand ask the animal a question about anything you would like to know regarding the animal's health, behavior, or needs. Then, put a pen in your non-dominant hand (the one you don't normally write with) and allow the animal to answer your question. Continue this dialogue back and forth until you feel you've come to a resolution or a deeper awareness of what the animal has been trying to communicate to you.

If you have a problem with the animal and need to express some emotions, start your dialogue by writing your feelings out with your dominant hand. If the animal has been upsetting you in any way describe what it is the animal has been doing and how it has impacted you. Then put a pen in your non-dominant hand and let the animal respond. Again, continue the dialogue until you feel some kind of resolution. 

An example of the latter type of dialogue came from a woman who reported that her well-trained French poodle suddenly started jumping up on furniture, behaving in an uncharacteristically disruptive manner, and regressing to puppy-like behavior. She found herself getting very annoyed and yelling at the dog all the time. This was very upsetting since she and her pet had a very harmonious connection. After doing a dialogue with the poodle she discovered that the dog walker, who was charged with taking the animal out during the day (when the owner was at work), had been limiting the usual time for outings. When the owner confronted the dog walker, the employee admitted that she had reduced time with the dog without consulting her. They came to an agreement about the minimum amount of time to be spent with the dog out-of-doors, and the pet's behavior cleared up within a week. The owner was once again relieved to return home each day to a happy, contented animal companion.

You too can be an "animal whisperer"! All it takes is paper, two pens and two hands.

Lucia

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Yuliia's Story

Yuliia Antonova is currently training in my Creative Journal Expressive Arts International Certification Training. She lives in Ukraine with her husband and two young children, and is sharing my methods through workshops and one-on-one consulting. Before taking the training, Yuliia was already a professional artist, but as you will see from this post, which she contributed, using the non-dominant hand has had a positive impact on her artwork.

Yuliia’s Story

At first my dialogues (using both hands) followed the recommendations and exercises in Lucia’s books: The Power of Your Other Hand and The Art of Emotional Healing. But when I felt how easy it was, I let both hands flow. The dialogues grew from short and abrupt to long three-paged conversations. It took me several months to establish a clear dialogue with my Inner Child, but now we are more than friends.

In October of 2018 I received an order from a woman who liked my paintings, which were presented at a small local art exhibition. My previous paintings were all born from my imagination and created for myself. This one was different. She wanted it to be 1 meter x 1 meter in size. This larger size was quite a challenge, huh? Anyway, I accepted the assignment because the woman gave me only a brief concept of what should be portrayed. The rest of the process was left to my vision and imagination.

Of course, at home I started to procrastinate right away. I did everything but the painting. I got mad at myself and that was when I thought of reaching out for a helping hand from my Creative Child.

My Creative Child was the one who kept me tuned in during my pregnancy period—she learned Spanish with me, she drew pictures with me, and more.

This is the dialogue, which evolved between me and my Creative Child back then in October of 2018:

Note: with my non-dominant hand, which is my left, I write in mirror fashion. Lucia describes this option in her book The Power of Your Other Hand.

Me (with dominant hand):

Hello
again
My sweet
Creative Child!
I missed you
Thank you though
For your help
For an inspiration that you gave me…
That made me Rock!
Now I need you again. I am starting this big piece,
Not yet masterpiece, but… R U there?

Creative Child (with non-dominant hand):

Hey, soul sister!
I am happy to hear that.
I told you then to rely on me.
And now you can and should count on me
As well.
Just give me those brushes and paints, and
Give me good music.
This painting requires good mood.
We should fill it with good vibes.
I will paint it for you.
Turn your brain off, when
I will be painting!
It will be our
masterpiece.
Luv u!

Yuliia's journal entry including mirror writing as recommended in
The Power of Your Other Hand

After this brief dialogue the painting was born. Slowly, piece by piece. And each time I was stuck with something, I’d take a brush into my non-dominant hand and let it flow on a canvas. Each time it’d be like a breath of fresh air. Of course, my non-dominant hand couldn’t draw perfect lines, but painting with my left hand would break the wall so that the right hand could continue its journey.

Yuliia's painting with the help of her Creative Child and non-dominant hand

Yuliia Antonova

vitainlumine@gmail.com

-----

Lucia

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Finding Inner Wisdom through Your Other Hand

Written with Lucia's left hand

Many authors have written to me that they have written books of poetry and inner wisdom that came through their non-dominant hand. The most common description I've heard from these authors is "the book wrote itself."

The words that you see above written with my non-dominant hand, wrote themselves one day when I asked my Inner Wisdom to speak. As usual I had no idea what would appear on the page. When I have asked for guidance from a well of wisdom deep within myself, I have always received nurturing words of comfort as well as insights to apply in my everyday life and work. When I was completing the last chapter of The Power of Your Other Hand, entitled The Hand of God Within, I turned to my other hand, giving it the last word. Here is what it said in my non-dominant hand:

Just say that the deepest
well of inner knowing
and of peace is within
everyone. It can be
reached, in stillness,
in quiet, and in
solitude.

I am here in everyone
and everything and
the glory of being
human is that you
can know and ex-
perience at-one-ment with
me. For we are one.

When you are afraid,
lost, doubting - be
still, go inside and
find your True Self.
I will be there - where
I've always been -
waiting for you to
recognize the truth
of who you really
are.

I will speak through
everything that is so
human in you - your
fellings, your wishes,
your body, your 
relationships.

(Written by my dominant hand)
How do I know I'm not just making you up out of 
my imagination? How do I know that you really exist?

You will know. If you
don't recognize me at
first, eventually you
will. Sometimes when 
you have lost your
way and are far away
from your true Self,
you may doubt that I
exist. That is when you
have forgotten who you
really are. But if you
will speak with me
as you are now, I will
respond. 

Later on
when you read our
conversation, you will
recognize my real-
ness. You will see
your own doubting
mind, and you will
fell my essence
and know it to be
yours. You will see
the difference between
your small, fearful,
anxious self and your
true, beautiful and
peaceful Self. And 
since you have
written both voices,
you'll realize
that they both came
from you. Then you
will see that the
Highest Truth and
Wisdom resides
within you. Everything
else is illusion. You
will see that you've
had it backwards
all these years.

You thought your
self was the little scared,
confused "character"
that doubts and worries
and defends itself. That
is the figment of imagination.
That is the thing you made
up with your mind.

I am the Real You. I
am your True Self
reminding you to
wake up, come home
to the bliss of your
Inner Self.


Lucia

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Breaking Through Creative Blocks

I've received hundreds of letters over the years from readers who broke through creative blocks simply by writing with their non-dominant hand. They have discovered a poet within, an inner artist, an inventor, an adventurer and more. Some individuals, like artist Mona Brookes, didn't have a creative block as most people would define it, but she did have a fear of traveling.

After drawing and writing with her non-dominant hand, Mona experienced a chain reaction of creative breakthroughs in all areas of her life. She also did written dialogues using both hands. Many blocks vanished with a speed that is truly amazing. This is not to say that right/left hand writing was solely responsible for the changes in Mona's life. However, she feels it was a big catalyst for these changes.

One of Mona's most immobilizing blocks was a "travel phobia". She had just turned 45 but had never traveled because she was afraid of getting lost, missing planes, or entering new environments. Shortly after she started doing left-hand writing and drawing she worked up the courage to take a car trip from Los Angeles to Santa Fe, New Mexico with a friend. There were many complications on this trip serving to test Mona's "travel phobia." However, in the end, she had a wonderful time. "It was the first vacation I ever enjoyed," she recalled with a big smile. She has since become a confirmed traveler.

One of the rewards of removing blocks is that it builds self-confidence. The breakthrough of the travel experience gave Mona the confidence to overcome other obstacles. She gained faith in her ability to play the piano. She accelerated the dance studies she had recently embarked upon. At first she was extremely self-conscious and shy about dancing in front of others. She later danced with professionals and appeared in a dance-movement video.

Mona also took on new challenges in business. Before founding her own school, called MonArt, she had been a public servant. "I never saw myself as a businesswoman," she said. "I never dreamed that I was capable of going into business for myself. But after doing all these other things I thought I couldn't do, I started expanding my classes and trained many more instructors in my method." Within two years of being introduced to her non-dominant hand, Mona had developed programs in public schools and expanded from three hundred and fifty to more than five thousand students. She later trained teachers from all over the world to establish MonArt schools in their communities. This involved traveling globally to visit her MonArt instructors, proving that her fear of traveling and also of being a businesswoman had been conquered.





Mona's story appears in Chapter Four - Hand in Hand. There are many block buster exercises in The Power of Your Other Hand. No matter what area of your life you feel blocked or stagnant in, there are tools in the book for breaking through to the other side.

Mona is the author of two books featuring her MonArt method:

Drawing With Children: A Creative Method for Adult Beginners, Too

Drawing for Older Children & Teens: A Creative Method for Adult Beginners, Too

Lucia

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The Inner Child Speaks through the Non-Dominant Hand

I'm pleased to introduce this week's guest blogger, Chuck Chamberlain, CJEA, a certified practitioner of my Creative Journal Expressive Arts methods living and working in China.

Triggers Are Opportunities

by Chuck Chamberlain

There is an assumption in society that it’s best to avoid triggers. After all, they can lead to destruction at worst, or extreme discomfort at best. But there are good reasons why triggers, despite their discomfort, can be opportunities in disguise. When a prior traumatic experience is triggered, there is a window of opportunity to deal with it effectively. Often, until triggered, those traumatic and incompletely processed experiences remain so far “backstage” it isn’t possible to effectively process them. With the right tools, a trigger opportunity can bring about a lasting change in a person’s life. Sometimes, the right “tool” is a mental health professional, especially if the triggered experience is deemed to be overwhelming or induces an inclination to do harm to self or others. Often, triggers can be processed on your own, and there are tools available to help.

I will share a private, powerful aspect of my life: I was sexually abused and bullied as a child and sexually assaulted as an adult. Perhaps the worst and most pervasive feeling during these incidents was the feeling of being unable to control the situation. Consequently, as an adult, I have often been triggered by anything that even approximates control. For example, I have seldom been able to comfortably allow someone else to drive a car in which I was a passenger. In fact, I’ve even found flying in a commercial aircraft uncomfortable, not because I feared crashing, but because I was not the pilot! I’ve also found myself triggered when my wife would do anything that even smelled like control. She’s often described these experiences as, “walking on eggshells.” Obviously, this is not a condition that is good for relationships.

Living and working in China, where there is so much control held by government officials in every aspect of life, I have experienced triggers due to this issue of control. With so many trigger opportunities, I’ve been able to use CJEA (Creative Journal Expressive Arts) techniques to gain a better understanding and control of my own emotions during these triggering incidents.

CJEA is a brain-science-based method of creative expression developed by Dr. Lucia Capacchione in the 1970’s when she experienced some difficult health issues. It is currently the method of choice for a growing community of certified practitioners working with organizations within the military, schools, corrections departments, courts, public safety departments, corporations, and with individuals, couples and families. CJEA utilizes the power and unique characteristics of both sides of the brain. This is done by expressing one’s self through movement, drawing, sketching or sculpting combined with writing using both the dominant and non-dominant hand.

One day recently, after experiencing a “control issue” trigger that unleashed emotional and physical symptoms (irritability and sudden intestinal cramping), I seized the opportunity to explore more about my control issues using some simple CJEA techniques. Fortunately, I had my Beijing apartment to myself that day. I placed a blank piece of paper on the table and used my dominant hand (right hand, in my case) to write questions to myself, based on the CJEA training I had received. Then, with various colored pencils, I used my left hand to scribble the answers using either text or drawing.

By doing this, I was able to tap into parts of my brain that seemed resistant to connect to my brain’s speech centers, and therefore were not often utilized when trying to talk over my concerns with my wife or anyone else. These parts of me had held onto emotional content that had not been expressed since I was a child. Metaphorically speaking, this abused child within me had been wandering around just off-stage, making trouble. Now I was giving “him” unprecedented access to say what was on his mind. And he did! He expressed terrible feelings and wanted assurances from me (the adult me) that I would be more conscious of him and his concerns. I offered some heartfelt promises, and immediately felt more peaceful.

If this communication with myself sounds bizarre to you, I assure you that you too have various parts of you. Each part has its own energy level and each part experiences life a little differently. During my extensive training with Dr. Capacchione, one of the most intriguing revelations to me was that we all have specific parts within us, doing specific functions. It isn’t mysterious; it’s simply the way we were all built.

It wasn’t necessary, at least during this episode, to re-hash and remember all the abuse. If I had noticed the discussion going in that direction, I might have waited for my wife to be present, or at least in another room. No, I simply needed to communicate and negotiate with a childlike part of me about the feelings of being controlled.

From this experience and many like it, I have learned that I am an excellent therapeutic guide for my own mental health. I do not have a pathology and therefore do not need the help of a certified mental health professional. If that should ever become necessary, I wouldn’t hesitate to make use of that additional resource.

There is no reason to live a life full of misery and frustration. When the “Broadway play” that is life seems to be more chaotic than it should be, there is hope.

For more information about Chuck, contact Chamberlain Leadership Group LLC, 1010 Natalie Lane, Smyrna, GA 30082, visit www.chamberlainleadership.com, or email chuck@chamberlainleadership.com.

Lucia

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Giving Your Inner Child a Voice

I'm pleased to introduce this week's guest blogger Marlena Tanner, a dietitian working with individuals recovering from eating disorders. She is trained in my Creative Journal Expressive Arts methods and applies very effectively with her clients.

The Inner Child Sasses Back
by Marlena Tanner

As a dietitian, I can only write so many meal plans and provide so much education on nutrition and metabolism. While planning and education are helpful, they don’t shift deep, core beliefs about value. It’s difficult to follow a meal plan or engage in self-care when you can’t stand yourself. When my clients are baffled by their inability to follow through, I often ask, “how would you treat someone who you hate? Would you take good care of them?”

So, how do you shift from self-loathing to unconditional, self-love?

My lovely psychotherapist co-workers are specialized in helping clients do that inner work—and I’m so grateful for them. They help guide people through discovery of the origin of self-hatred, towards better understanding. Sometimes it’s as simple as undiagnosed depression that turns anger inwards. Through support and guidance, I learned that I’m neither worth hating or being afraid of. I am worth loving. And you are, too.

In therapy, you can identify cognitive distortions that drive your emotions and behaviors. You can learn the tools necessary to start thinking and acting differently. Throughout my journey, I gained additional, practical tools from my teacher Dr. Lucia Capacchione, founder of Creative Journal Expressive Arts (CJEA). In particular, these tools helped me combat the inner critic. One simple exercise I often do with my clients is to let the eating disorder (ED) voice or critic rant for two minutes on paper and say whatever nastiness it wants to say. 

Then I instruct them to switch hands and use their non-dominant hand to “sass back” on paper for another two minutes. I ask them to tap into their inner “brat” and just let it rip. Really blast that critic out of the water. It’s a simple but effective practice that can make reframing these negative thoughts easier. It’s also a way to tap into different parts of self so that we can connect the inner child to the inner nurturing and protective parents, for example.



Marlena Tanner, RD, CEDRD-S
Lead Program Dietitian-Supervisor
Central Coast Treatment Center
508 Higuera Street, San Luis Obispo, CA 93401
Ph (805) 591-0712 Fax (805) 594-1460
Marlena@CentralCoastTreatmentCenter.com
www.CentralCoastTreatmentCenter.com

----

Lucia

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An Artist's Cancer Journey: James's Story

I recently received this very touching letter from James Broehl, an artist who lives in Mexico. He shares how he has used his non-dominant hand while recovering from cancer affecting the right side of his body. Here is James's experience, including a sample of his pre-cancer art using the dominant hand, and art using the non-dominant hand while recovering from cancer.

Hello Lucia,

I was drawn to your book The Power of Your Other Hand as I have begun doing art again, with my left hand now. Last May, after a year plus of coughing, a tumor pushed up under my right lymph area. I have been an artist for the last 20 years seriously, as a creative process. This physical condition cut off the main nerve of my right arm and hand, and it went limp. After going to stage four, the cancer traveled to seven body parts. Fortunately, I went to the Dana Farber Cancer Center (DFCC) in Boston where they diagnosed my cancer as ALK (non smokers lung cancer) which is rare. Only 1% of cancers are of this type. The DFCC had a recovery medicine which went to all areas, including brain and spine and I shot back up in 2 weeks. So fast it was disorienting. They said the nerves would grow back, but would take a year in my right hand. The medicine would kill or contain the cancer.

Being a proactive character, one day I noticed my left hand writing my name with perfect script. I had not even requested this. I thought, why don’t I try painting left handed? I have been doing this now for 8 months. At first you see new things, new slightly awkward styles. I liked what I saw. With my left (non-dominant) hand, I seemed more free to express than I had after 20 years of art school and practice with the right (dominant) hand. I still continue with my left hand, because the pincer grasp of my right hand is still the last to come.

There is no way for me to express what it is like to discover a new part of oneself and accept it fully. Lately I gave a talk at an art forum putting up similar images done with left and right hands and I allowed observers to make comments. Most liked the new left-handed art, some said it was more childlike, free. What was amazing also is I encountered a new personality in myself, a more benevolent one. Somehow the use of left-handed painting had tapped into an area of my right brain where I became more compassionate.

As the right hand forges back I try to keep the positive things I saw about myself and life going. I have not yet tried right hand painting, but soon I hope painting will be a shared dialogue, as you mention in your book. I’m at page 81 now.

We take for granted the use of arm and hand as well as the whole body. So many muscles and commands take place instantly. Also, when you go to near death and return it makes you appreciate every moment. I now want to live and learn where my creativity and curiosity take me. Thanks for being curious yourself and writing this book. The power of body/brain is amazing.

If you have any questions that you are curious about please send them to me.

James Broehl
Ajijic, Mexico / Boston
jbroehl@hotmail.com

The non-dominant hand is waiting patiently for a chance to be dominant, and it expresses a different creativity. I believe the functions are different for each side of the brain. At first it's hard to accept, as one is very critical of the new hand. But with time it goes more quickly where you want to go; I believe into uncharted expression. —James Broehl

Right Hand 2017 - pre-cancer

Left Hand 2019 - recovering from cancer

Right Hand 2017 - pre-cancer

Left Hand 2019 - recovering from cancer

Right Hand 2017 - pre-cancer

Left Hand 2019 - recovering from cancer

Lucia

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Inner Healing: Jill's Story

A student of mine who started a deep inner healing process through dialogues with a physical discomfort is Jill. As a child, Jill wanted to become an actress when she grew up. But emotionally she wasn't able to follow through with her childhood dream and take it into adulthood. Instead she did what was expected of her: got married and had children. As she puts it, she became "Mrs. Somebody" and "Somebody's Mother."

After years of taking care of everyone else while ignoring her dream, Jill took a stand. She started seeing a therapist and also took one of my weekend journal workshops, where she discovered the healing power of her Inner Child through a right/left-hand dialogue. "It was a major breakthrough in my life," she recounts. Her first dialogue was a conversation with her headache. As she wrote, she soon contacted the Little Girl within who had been silenced for so many years.

HEADACHE DIALOGUE
(italics: non-dominant hand)

Who are you?

Your head.

How do you feel?

I feel pressure.

Why do you feel this—Are you saying pressure or pleasure?

Pleasure creates pressure.

Do you feel guilty when you are too happy?

I feel scared that something will happen so if I hurt it can't happen.

You hurt a little now. Would you like to tell me why?

Brain feels nice feeling nice is bad.

No, it is not nice to feel bad. It is not bad to feel nice. Who told you that?

Mommy said don't like your body it is naughty to love yourself.

Mommy was wrong about that. Anyhow she is not around anymore.

Yes she is in me I am her in your head.

Can I do something to help you so you won't hurt?

Yes you can tell me not to be afraid.

There is nothing to be afraid of. I will help you. I will take care of you. But I get angry sometimes.

If you are angry Mommy won't like you.

If Mommy doesn't like me because I get angry, then she doesn't understand. We can't control someone who doesn't understand.

It is OK to be angry but we need to find a way to express is that doesn't hurt you.

I am afraid.

What are you afraid of? Can I help you?

I want to be free.

What would you do if you were free?

I would hit and bite and scream.

Maybe we can go into a room by ourselves and do this. Would you like that?

Yes.

Are there other ways you can express yourself without really hurting anyone else?

I want to dance.

Years ago we used to play music and dance when we were alone—would you like that?

Yes I don't care how I look. You care how I look. You make trouble for me. You tell me I am clumsy. I want to be graceful but I am scared and scarred.

You have scars from the freeway accident. Is that why? Does all this go that far back?

Everybody always said use your head. I scarred myself to get attention because I am special and I wanted you to know me.

Were the migraine headaches a way of getting attention, then, too?

You wouldn't use me so I had to remind you. I want to think and feel together. You are Libra the balance. I am unbalanced you have to balance me.

How can I do that?

You must love me and respect me. I feel and think too, not just thinking.

Are you saying that I didn't consider your feelings enough?

You want to be a thinking head only feel somewhere else. Not right. Head does think and feel both. You say feel is bad so I feel bad.

If you believe feeling is good, would you feel good?

That is not exactly right.

What would make you feel good? I notice you hurt now.

That's right I hurt. Let me cry. Daddy never let me cry. I know Daddy isn't here any more but you sometimes carry him around. I want to cry when I'm sad.

I will let you cry when you're sad. I will try not to worry what people think or say. I will love you even if you hurt.

That's right. I only hurt to get your attention. I love you and want to work for you but you need to listen to what I'm feeling. I will give you warning signs. Tune in. Listen.

I feel more relaxed now. I will try to work with you.

Don't try. We already have too much trying. Just be you and I'll be me and now what someone else wants. Just let me flow in to the stream that is the bloodstream and I will be in natural rhythm if you don't disturb it. You pick on me too much. Leave me be and let me flow the way I am supposed to. Goodbye.

In this dialogue, Jill (the adult) became a Wise Counselor and Nurturing Parent to her own Inner Child, who was "trapped" in her headache. She discovered that she had played victim all her life. Actually, her Inner Child was the victim and by repressing its existence she had unwittingly perpetuated her own limitations. She decided to stop being a victim, started paying attention to her own goals and following through with them. Jill studied acting, became a professional, and has appeared on television. It all started with a headache, but it led to making her dreams come true.

(Chapter 6, The Power of Your Other Hand)

Lucia

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A Life Changing Experience: Brad's Story

Since I began teaching and lecturing on the subject of writing with the other hand, ... I have met some individuals who were forced by circumstances to write with their non-dominant hand. A broken arm or wrist, a stroke, or some other sudden injury or illness led to a temporary or permanent switch to the other hand. Many of these individuals experienced deep inner changes, opened undeveloped dimensions of their personalities, and uncovered buried talents. Brad is a case in point. An attractive and energetic young man, Brad was in his early 20s when I interviewed him. He discovered a whole new world because of an accident, forcing him to write with his other hand. Here is Brad's story:

As a young child I wrote stories and had a large imaginary world to play in. My neighborhood appeared to be a boundless garden of adventure, mystery, danger, and fun . . . . .
 
I had an obsession for games and a terrible fear of losing or being rejected. As a young boy I ran away from my first baseball game crying because I had run the wrong direction around the bases. At an early age I was made to realize that if I wanted to play men's games I had to learn the rules and pay attention to detail. I saw that a man's world is very critical. Judgments are made with large consideration to the end goal, and the means are carefully restricted to the straightest line toward the goal.
 
So I set out to learn the rules, and I learned them better than anyone else, to the point of being able to tell my coaches when they had made mistakes before they recognized them. I learned to direct all my anger and desires toward the goal: winning.
 
I lost sight of my fluid, youthful world as I grew up and became more and more rigid in body and spirit. I tried to take on the outer appearances and inflexible standard of a winner. I was quarterback and team captain at school, a leader on the field, a sacrificer of my body. I could throw a football 75 yards at age 15. I pitched on the baseball team and developed a keen jump shot and hook in basketball. My right arm spent long days reaching, throwing, and extending. I did little reading but did well in school, especially in math and sciences. My language skills were poor. I always worked hardest in this area and received my worst grades in English and foreign languages. At 15 I had many male friends in high school and almost no female friends. In those days I preferred a good dirt-ball game to a date.
 
It is still very vivid in my memory, the day I fell to the floor on the basketball court of my high school with a pain so strong in my right shoulder and arm that somehow I knew instantly my dreams were shattered. I knew I would never play professional football as I so fervently desired. In fact, later I found out that I would never be able to throw any kind of ball again.
 
A week later I sat at my final examination in English with a dislocated right arm. I was very angry because the teacher was forcing me to write my essay with my left hand. My right arm was tightly bound to my body and totally immobile. I had been confident I would get off without writing any essay that day, which would have been fine with me. Soon I found out that if I didn't write one I could fail the class. I spent almost three hours completely absorbed in my new and arduous task. I found myself using all the pent-up anger and frustration as fuel to write a very long, barely legible and somewhat sarcastic essay. By the time I turned my paper in I had forgotten how enraged I had been or that so much time had passed. Taking charge of my emotions had required great effort.
 
Afterwards I felt vulnerable, exhausted, and close to tears. Yet I wouldn't dare let these feelings out. I couldn't ride my bike so I walked home three miles. My shoes came untied many times but I got great satisfaction out of tying them with my left hand. At home I became completely fanatical about keeping my life's routines as normal as possible with the use of only my left arm. I cooked, wrote papers, made telephone calls, drove a car, and performed personal hygiene with my left hand. Every little detail became intensified, important, difficult, and exciting. Everything in my life became a challenge which was solely designed to teach me a lesson: that I could do something which I had thought I couldn't do. This in turn gave me new self-confidence and opened a previously unknown world to me.
 
I received a "C" grade on my English essay. I hadn't given enough, the teacher seemed to be saying, but that essay was the beginning of a major transformation in my life. I couldn't use my right arm for six weeks, and just after getting the cast off I injured it again. During this time I became totally focused on reading and writing. The more I read the more my child-like curiosity surfaced. My visual imagination overflowed in long and insightful reports, essays and poetry. My grades in English went from "C" to "A."
 
As my inner life expanded, so did my friends and surroundings. During the recuperation I was separated from my jock friends who, it turned out, were not very good friends after all. So I had to create new friendships, most of them with women. I found I could talk to them more easily about my new feelings. And I fell in love for the first time.
 
Along with these changes, I also wanted to move out of the city. I really felt the need to get in touch with the natural rhythms and patterns of life, with my body and spirit. So I went to live in the woods until I entered college to study another physical discipline: dance.
 
Brad opened up to his own creativity and entered the arts world when he turned a catastrophe into a golden opportunity. He went on to become a performing dancer and instructor of Contact Improvisation, a new movement form. His unique style combines fluidity and strength: power that expresses a balance he has attained between the active and receptive aspects of his personality. Brad attributes the beginning of this major life change to the day he dislocated his arm and was forced to use his other hand.
 
Words have continued to be an important outlet for Brad, who later studied acting. As he told me: "When I started focusing on acting, I found myself writing in mirror images with my left hand. It was spontaneous and completely unexpected. I feel it has stretched my awareness in exciting ways."
 
(excerpted from Chapter 4, The Power of Your Other Hand)

Lucia

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